How Do Emotional Wounds Affect Relationships?

When someone responds negatively to you, in the same way as when you were a child, old emotions come to the surface. You may feel excessive anger, fear, hurt or devalued. These emotions will intensify your reaction.
A present situation may be innocent, but you respond with emotion from a previous experience. In other words, you look at present circumstances through the dark glasses of a prior incident.
For example:
I may ask you if you took the garbage out.
If this was a question often asked of you in a negative tone as a child, such as, “Did you take the garbage out? How many times do I have to tell you to put the garbage out before you watch TV? -you may respond defensively or with anger.
If I were to ask you if there was any money left over after paying an expense, you may think I am questioning your integrity, while I am only wondering if we can afford to buy something else.
If I happen to walk past you without greeting you, you may think I am angry with you, or I don’t like you, while I am simply focused on something else.
Until a person has healed or has forgiven the offender, he or she may have difficulty getting along with other individuals with the same personality-type as the one who previously hurt them.
Intense emotions will constantly be triggered by present situations that parallel the old wound.

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